Do you ever take time to look around?

I've been drowning in this world for long that i don't know where to get back to my road. It's been a long time that i have never start focusing on my carrier. My English becomes so poor that i can't even know what is right or what is wrong when i write. My speaking in not confident enough. My skill is not clear. Where am i really heading to? Have i even start thinking about it? Have you put enough effort on what you should do rather than wasting time watching movie and others stuff? When do you really want to come back? What motivation can lead you back to the right road? When will you decide to come out of this road and start driving your way back home?

I only have this idea when i see what my brother-in-law, Ney Somkol, talked about what he wants in life and what he asked his children what they want in life. When this question come into my head, i become very jealous with others who are having family, who are heading to success, who are having what they want already. But me? where am I?

From now on, there are only 2 ways. Whether you go up or you go down. If you keep up with what yo are doing theseday, then it just means that you will automatically go down, but if you are motivated, you will go up automatically.

When it comes to this point, i always let the luck decide because i always doubt that i can find the motivation to keep me moving on forward. There is still no. I remember the most effective motivation is out only from my brother in law. Why? Because he's the one who inspired me. He show me how to become a great man. He doesn't just say how to be a great man, but he shows me the way. The way he does everyday is what a successful man do. Everyday, he got up early, toke bath, then he went to work early. He toke his breakfast there. He is really detail in his work. He came out of work place late, and when he came to the house for lunch, he toke a bath first, then he take a nap, then he take a bath again and prepare to go to work again. At the evening, he went to study English to pursue his dream of pursuing his master degree in Australai. When he came back from class, he toke bath, read newspaper, take dinner and at watch tv for 5-10mns. At exactly 8, he start his self-study. Nobody is gonna wasting his time. He's gonna take that time for 2 to 3 hours to prepare study for his exam.

You see this life? What have he done to get what he is having now? You think it's easy? No! Nothing easy always come to you in this world. You can never get that kind of thing in life. You still have another 3 semester opportunity and it's very great opportunity since you won't have much break for that. You'd better start thinking of what is the best for you and go for that. To me, i don't have much ambition, i just want to be recognized by my family and my friend only.

I remember what Bong Kol said. The first 2 scholarship i got is motivated by him. He indirectly told me i would be very honor if i will be granted for a scholarship because among your family nobody got the scholarship like you, then i got 2 scholarship. Then, another one, i was motivated by myself, i got the scholarship to HERE.

You know what? Life is short! The opportunity doesn't always come to you, you have to figure it out and try to find the way to reach your dream. Do you ever imagine going back, unable even to speak English or write English? Unable even to understand what other peoples talking about when you go to work, unable even to discuss with you colleuge, unable even to order people to do the right job? Unable even to face with the people who rank are much lower than you? Is that what you want?

I don't want i can ask you to improve now cuz it's not the right time yet, but i want you to get along with the system and try your best to focus on something serious rather than entertainment. Entertainment is good, but too much entertainment is bad. You better get up early and think. keep writing this to waken up yourself until you wake up.

I'm so disappointed in you, Puthy!